Updates

Wow! It's been almost a whole month since I last posted! lol. Sorry about that to anyone who's been checking in with any sort of consistency. :) Well, the last month has been a pretty busy one for me, but I'm currently sitting on my new bed in my new dorm room writing a new blog post on my computer (which is not new, in case anyone was wondering!). It's nice to be back in class again. Although, I think my school load is going to be quite a bit heavier this semester than it has been in the past, and I'm trying to figure out exactly what that's going to look like and how much time it's going to take. I'm excited to be studying and learning new things, and eager to see what God has planned in my life this semester. (According to Facebook, I'm either getting married or dying, but I prefer to think that Facebook is wrong. lol.)

It's amazing to look back at where I was two years ago and see where I have come from there. I'm at a place I never would have imagined myself. However, I do feel that it is where God has led me, where He has placed me, and I am content in that (at least most of the time. There are those days where I simply say, "God, what are you doing with my life anyhow?" and occasionally even those days when I think "Are you really even there and listening to me at all!"). Looking back simply reminds me how very much can change in such a short time, and causes me to wonder all the more what my life will look like in another two years. Where will He be leading me then?

Anyhow, I'm going to go work on writing one of my many papers, but I will try to post a bit more regularly on here, even if those more regular posts are just random musings (like those above).

My vacation to Michigan was wonderful! We went kayaking, hiking, canoeing, and shopping in the beautiful forests of northern Michigan, and I got to spend some wonderful time with Tamara and her family. We ended up staying a bit longer than we had planned in order that Tamara could have more time with her grandmother, which was a good thing. The road trip was lots of fun too. We had two days up there and two days back and both directions we read aloud to eachother and listened to books on tape (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Elizabeth Gaskell, G.K. Chesterton, Edgar Allen Poe), did crossword puzzles, played games on her iPod touch, and just generally had some good girl-talk time. :D On our way there we stayed at a little bed and breakfast in Hannibal, MO, the hometown of Mark Twain and Molly Brown, and on our way back we drove through St. Louis and saw the arch. All around, it was an incredible trip. Everything up there was soo picturesque, and I hope that one day I can visit again. :)

Now I'm back home, getting back into the groove of life here, catching up on e-mail, facebook, etc. (we didn't have any real internet in MI), and getting ready for school to start back. I'm very excited for school to start, looking forward to a new school, new classes, and hopefully making lots of wonderful new friends. I'm getting to the point where I'm really ready for classes to start, excited to begin learning all sorts of wonderful new things, and looking forward to seeing what God has for me on this path He's been leading me down!

My Anxious Heart

I have a confession to make. I am a stresser. I stress over all sorts of decisions, big and small, and oftentimes allow that stress to steal much of the peace and joy which I might otherwise find in life (not to mention my health!). This is something which God has been dealing with my on quite a bit the last few months as I've been struggling to make some important decisions (as well as some not so important ones, lol.) In my quite times with Him He's given me verses like Psalm 37:7a "Do not fret," and Philippians 4:6, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let you requests be made known to God." My mother has addressed this issue with me as well, telling me that I stress too much over everything. So, I'm working on it. Although, it's certainly not easy. I feel like my conversations with the Lord have been going something like this:
"Father, I'd really appreciate your guidance on this decision. It's stressing me a lot, and I need to decide. I have a deadline!"
"It's alright. Just trust in me. You've told me my request, now wait for me to answer it."
"But, Lord, I have a deadline!"
"Yes, I heard you."
"But, but, the deadline's soon! And it's an important decision!"
"I know. Don't worry. You'll have your answer when you need it."
So, we'll have this conversation for awhile. Then, I'll begin to think I may have an answer, and I'll start stressing over that.
"Are You sure that's the right decision, Lord? I don't know... The other option looks pretty good too. Are You telling me this, or am I just thinking it on my own? Is this guidance from You, or just my own thoughts and emotions and feelings, etc. playing tricks on me?"
Fortunately, He is faithful and patient with me. He does give me my answers when I need them, and, slowly but surely, He is shaping me and teaching me, calming my anxious heart. :)
Thus it is that I have made some big decisions lately about my school, living situation, etc. which will likely have a significant impact on my life in the next couple of years, and I am excited (though still a bit nervous as well) to see what He is going to do with it all!

On a separate note, I am leaving on a nearly two week vacation to Michigan on Wednesday and while there will have very little internet capability. Therefore, I will likely be neglecting this poor blog even more than usual, but maybe I'll have some fun things to post from my trip when I get back!